Waiting to Belong
by Anei
Summary: A parents silent words to their orphan children. Seto and Mokuba weren't always considered a Kaiba. Their heartfelt sorrows until a better tomorrow. The essence of brotherly love.


**To Belong**

The little orphan boy with shinning blue eyes took them all away.

I could tell.

I could see.

Yet, they were not for me.

Sometimes they were captivated by my intelligence. I could see in their eyes; oh how they wanted to be the saviour to this orphan genius.

I wanted to leave more than anything.

I know you could see it too.

You could see how those grown-ups eyes brightened when they looked at me. I know it hurt you that they never spared a second look at you.

Yet, it's why I knew they were all fools.

How could they not see my baby brother? How could they not see you were the angel among us? I could never let you go.

**I promised I'd never let you go,  
Now wipe those tears away.**

More came, and as soon as they saw you, they had this little twinkle in their eye. They would stop and look at you. It scared me. I wasn't jealous. I never will be jealous of you. I was scared of loosing you too. I was scared because I knew you wanted to leave. I was scared because one day, you would see, you were better off without me. What would I do without you? You looked so much like mom. You were just like her. I don't think I could lose you too. But, I could see what this place did to you. I could see how your smile faded. I could see that something in you changed.

I saw how your beautiful big blue eyes stopped smiling like they use to.

**I wont forget how the dark  
Took your heart**

Mom and dad would always tell me family was the most important thing in life. There was nothing more important than family.

I would always tell them I knew. They would then turn and look at you, playing with your toy cars, and they would tell me again how it was important to be good brothers to each other. And I would always tell them that I loved you no matter what.

Who couldn't love you? How couldn't I love you when you looked so much like both of them?

They would always tell me the story of why we never had the chance to meet our grandparents and uncles. How sometimes, things didn't always work out like you thought they would. Yet, never to let that set me back and to remember, family was the light of our lives. Without family, a person couldn't really live.

Those nights we huddled in that small bed, sheets tightly wrapped against us,

**I remember you cried,  
Never to leave your side**

I felt like I was selfish. I was so selfish from keeping you here and for asking you to stay with me. You deserved so much better. They all wanted you, but I kept you here. I kept you from the one thing you wanted the most. I kept you in this prison. I wanted you to leave. I wanted you to be happy. I wanted that shine in your eyes. I wanted you to smile. I wanted you to leave, like you deserved to leave. Yet, I was so selfish.

It hurt. It hurt to know I was too selfish to give you the happiness you deserved. I'm sorry I couldn't be a better brother.

I know, somehow mom and dad must have died because of me. It's because I'm too selfish. We could have been a happy family,

**Something's are meant to pass  
Others- meant to last**

I could see that sad smile on your face.

I knew I could never be enough. I could never be mom and dad. I knew I couldn't be enough for you. Yet, I would try. I would try anything for you. I would die for you if I ever needed to because, you were family and without you, I couldn't live on.

**Now stop the tears,**  
**Soon it will be night**  
**We won't need to fight**

How your sweet little smiled would make the world a better place. Your adorable laughs and your innocent hearts could heal the deepest wounds.

Oh my dear Seto. If I never had you, I would have never known how to live.

Oh my dear Mokuba, without you, we never would have been complete.

My little Seto, I remember your first day of school. I remember how you looked at me with such serious eyes and told me, you would walk to the bus alone. How you were a big boy and it was more important that I rested. My sweet little boy, I watched you from the door. Maybe it was the best you couldn't see me cry as I watched my beautiful boy's first day at school.

I was anxious all day.

Your father laughed and kissed me when I admitted I had called the school in the morning to make sure you had gotten there safely. He kissed me again when I told him I called a second time in the afternoon to make sure you were okay.

I remember how you would rest your head on my lap, as I would sing lullabies to Mokuba.

I remember your excitement when Mokuba said your name for the first time. How he would stretch his little arms and stretched out for you as he called out to you. It didn't matter to you that he couldn't pronounce his 's' yet. You laughed every time he called out to you. I'll never forget how you would always tell him, "Mokuba, it's 'ssssssss-eto'. Not 'toe', you silly goof."

Oh my sweet children, without you, I would never have known what love was.

**Just sit tight**

There were times when days where harder than others. The days when they didn't give us enough food, I always made sure to give you some of my food. Those times when the big boys picked on you, I'd always make sure they knew never to pick on you again.

I knew you found it was hard that mom and dad weren't here anymore. I'd cry when you were asleep, cause I knew, somehow it was my fault they died. I'd make it up to you.

**And you'll see,**  
**We'll both be strong**  
**And we will soon belong**

I never loved a woman as much as I loved your mother. Oh, I remember the first time I saw her. That day was the day I finally knew what it was like to be alive.

Everything was right with your mother. The birds would sing for us, the sun came up for us, the stars twinkled in the sky in happiness. Oh, how the world became brighter when I met her. Your mother was the prettiest girl I had ever seen.

Everyday I wondered why she loved me like she did. So, everyday, I loved her a little more than before.

When we had you, Seto, I was the happiest man alive. God had made us this beautiful boy. I didn't know until then I could love someone else as much as I loved you.

I remember how I could never say no to you. Those blue eyes too much like your mothers. How could I deny you anything? You laughed like her too. Oh, my darling, how you made us understand what family really was.

Seto, there is someone else out there for you too. I hope you meet someone like I met your mother. But, sometimes, you need to go through hell and back before you do. Sometimes, it feels like this misery keeps raging on so,

**Don't give up so easily on life, darling**  
**Be like a starling, just reach for the sky  
Why don't you just try?**

If I could kiss away all those tears, if I could stop what is to come. Oh my baby boys. If I could tell you, that one-day, things will get better.

Sometimes, life has a funny way of working. It will push you down. It will suffocate you and knock you down again and again and again.

But be assured, my little baby boys, you have something better waiting for you. My little Seto, my dearest Mokuba, someone will come and heal your soul. For all the pain you go through, you will be given twice the love of all you have endured.

You cannot see it now, but one day, I swear to you, you will have someone for you. There is someone out there waiting, just for you.

**Now take back your precious heart**

I forgot how to breath when your mother told me she had cancer.

I cried when she said the doctor told her she only had a few months to live.

**You will need it, for life there**

I thought that Gozaburo was our only way out. I knew with him, we could get everything that we talked about. I knew, with him we would have everything we talked about.

I didn't know it was going to be like this. If I would have known how much he hurt you, believe me Mokuba, I would never have…

You were the only reason I went on. I loved how you still sneaked into my room at night. Without you…

My little Mokuba,

**Now stop the tears,**

Seto, without you…

Seto, if you weren't my brother… I don't know what I would do. I don't know how you could still love me even though this was my entire fault. How can you still love me?

But you still do. I don't know why, but I promise, I will love you forever. It doesn't matter if you hate me one day. I'll still love you. I would do anything for you. I would die for you if I ever needed too.

Gozaburo is away now, so rest Seto,

**Soon it will be night**  
**we won't need to fight**

Everyday I woke up, I would tell myself I would get rid of Gozaburo. Somehow, one day, he would be gone. One day he wouldn't hurt us anymore. One day, he wouldn't hurt you anymore.

All this was my fault, and I would fix it no matter what. I'm just sorry I couldn't be better for you. I don't know how you could still love me after everything I put you through, but I swear I'll make it up to you.

You are the angel that was put here just for me. How could I doubt it? You are the only one I know who could smile like you do. You're the only one who can smile through all this. You're the only one I know who can smile, despite being here with Gozaburo.

You're the only one I know who can smile despite the fact that out parents are dead.

You're the only one who can smile and make my heart feel like it does.

Mokuba, my little brother,

**Just sit tight**

It was hard to explain that your mother had cancer. We had talked about how we would tell you both. How, one day she wouldn't be here anymore.

How do you explain to children what it means to be dead? How can you tell your children their mother was leaving?

Your mother and I decided that these last few months would be happy. We would spend everyday in happiness. We would live, like it was out last day.

I cried that night when both of you had told us that everyday felt like Christmas now. How even though you were happy before, you were happier now.

Your mother was strong. She smiled even though she knew she would never see her baby boys grow up. She would never see you go to prom and she would never see you graduate.

I asked her how she could find the strength to smile even though she would never see you get married and have children of your own.

She told me she couldn't be sad, because even if it was short, she had had us. She told me how she couldn't imagine how she could ever have been happy without us in her life.

I always thought it was cancer that was going to take her away from us...We died instantly.

We were still holding hands when the transport lost control and hit us.

My little boys, even if we're dead, we're still here. Sometimes things didn't always work out like you thought they would.

You still have many hardships ahead of you, but we'll be here besides you. Through the good and through the bad.

**We'll both be strong**

Don't worry Mokuba, somehow I know,

**You and I will soon belong**


End file.
